woohoooo. (=

Err-.-

2009-06-14T02:34:00.000-07:00

Hey,i'm kind of miss everyone): I wil text everyone real soon. Even better if you guys text me NOW! Lol. I've been slacking at home lately,which i don't really know what's the reason i felt so lifeless. It seems that my life is already one-sided demolished. I couldn't hold on to the fact that i'm not strong like how i think i am. Why is this happening to me? I wished i could run away but each time i took a step forward,it feels that someone is pulling me back again. I've also realised that i have been bad-tempered this few days and i knew that my friends have endure with me of my behaviour. I really appreciate that guys. But,i don't deserve it. It makes me feel guilty. -.- Hmm. I'm off.

(:

2009-05-20T03:11:00.000-07:00

Meeting you was fate,becoming your friend was a choice but falling in love with someone like you,i had no control over. I tried so hard to forget and. Trying to forget you is like trying to remember someone i have never met. I know im not strong. Neither am i weak. I just need some time to think for myself): Till now,i just don noe why. Is it because you are my friend? Hmm. You're a strange guy. After much thinking. I guess my fairytale is over. It's time i let you go. Letting you go forever,away from me. Haiz. I swear i forget you. Btw,i really miss ol' of my sayangs-sayangs. Yeh,we miss you oso jana. Ta mghilangkan diri but just busy ya'noe w hmw ol(: We will meet up soon. Promise! Happened to on9 for 30 mins. Lol. Takecare yaw- will update real soon.

Officially dead. -.-"

2009-01-01T00:53:00.000-08:00

Hello people~ This is going to be my last post and that my blog will be officially dead today and maybe until forever,i guess. Heee. It's not that i don't want to post again,but i have to shut down the computer for a long time until i finished with my o'level this year. Ne semua peraturan mak dengan ayah tau. Not mine. -.-" The reason is. They are worried and scared that i will flunk all my subjects like what i did last year for my n'level by focussing more on the computer than books. That's what i do what every single day? People contact most through computer right? The worst outcome is. I failed two subjects and luckily i get nine points. So,i'm going to buck up for now. (: No worries. You all can text me if there's anything. Or even better call-me up. I'm so sad that i won't be able to touch the computer or type on my keyboard anymore. Blame the peraturan la. I can't even stick to the television the whole day. Mum set me the time limit and what should i study for the whole day. If i didn't follow what she said,i get her nagging. Easy ah. Lol. But,whatever it is that she control or how bad she is,i still love her the most. Anak mane ta sayang mak die? Weeee. Even just now,she nag at me over a stupid school skirt. I didn't even talk back because it's only a stupid skirt. Wahliau- it's not the end of the world. Oh,i forget. It's already. HELLO 2009,GOODBYE 2008!

My resolutions?
- I want to be the daughter mum won't always nag at every single day. [:
- I want to be the third top in every subjects for this year,i would try can't i?
- I want to have someone that trust me and like who i am.
- I want to make my teachers proud of me.
- I want tuition and also remedials to improve my maths and english.
- I want to forget him forever,i mean it. ]:
- I want my friendship to be strong,and make more friends with the others.
- I want everyone in a relationships to be happy always.
- And last but not least,i badly want to pass my o'level and got into a better courses.
Please,grant me this wishes? [:

boring.

2008-12-29T07:03:00.000-08:00

Hey,i'm just updating because someone is asking me to update my blog. *smile with teeth to charliesah* Lol. Btw,today i went back to school so that i can accompany atikah and mira for financial assistance form and also to take a look-out on the npcc's. I must say. They were super awesome and ready for the cca promotion day,i guess la. To me,they really had done great. I must congratulate the sec's three or shall i said the coming sec's four. I missed taking care of you guys and taking nonsense from all of you. You were the bunch i want to see marching at the parade with your heads held high. (: After taking the form. I ate one prata egg with one prata plain outside school's coffee shop. Kenyang seh. Actually,i wait 10 minutes for my prata. Blame the indian guy la. Paid,but forget to give food. Service is so slow nowadays. Then,went back to mpr see the modern dancers. Until,i feel that someone really shows some attitude-for-nothing. Argh. Hypocrite heh people like this? Be nice infront but end up backstabbing behind. Luckily,someone told us. Get off from the mpr and waited under the block for mira. Gedebak-gedebuk. Sampai aje at home,sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep til 5plus. Penat soi- Kkeh la. Na kuwa jap. Bye-

Btw,mamat. Happy birthday aye!(:

-.-"

2008-12-27T05:18:00.000-08:00

Grr,i'm bored to death. I got nothing to do. *sigh and throwing stupid handphone away* Nobody text me asking to go out somewhere. Wah- it shows you all really busy with some stuffs. ): Mum,please tell me to pluck your white hair or vacuum the living room? Ahah. Like real heh. Lol. She already vacuum the living room and does all the house chores today by herself. But,i got nothing to do the whole day today except watching television and figuring out how i should go to school on first day. Lame-O! -.-" Btw,mum went to jemputan kahwin today and brought home nasi briyani. Whereas i have to stay at home to look after my little brother. Eww~ ta sedap langsung. I ate only the chicken. Then,i watched 'peter pan'. Damn sweet! Ha ha. I just wished singaporean boys would be just like the boys i saw on television. Btw,mum said i watched movies above my age that only parents are "allowed" to watch on youtube. When i only watching little secrets movie. Wth(?) She think i'm that '__________' is it. Fancy her saying that to me. Thanks a lot heh, my-mum-who-i-think-don't-seem-to-trust-me-at-all. Pfft.

boo.

2008-12-24T23:13:00.000-08:00

I cannot stopped yawning until now. I woke up around 12+ today. I missed my two am movie night,pasal da nantuk sanat. I didn't realise what time it is until mak keep nagging asking me to wake up. By shouting like this,'Eh emah,kau bangun le tak? Kau na besarkan buntuk kau lagi heh?' -.-" Wth. You even know what time i sleep after watching television. One plus okay(?) I go watch this movie called,Phantom of the opera. The movie + song is damn nice. Very sweeeeeeeeeeeeet- I like the song. Especially,the one titled no point of return. (: You should listen to it. Ha ha. Btw,just now wake up i go watch mickey mouse's holiday first at disney channel. Cute heh! Telalu penat sanat na pi mandi dulu. Hey,it's christmas. Kasi chance la sekali-sekala. Hmm. I didn't get any present ah. Mum,where's my everlast watch and my nike beg? Dad,where's my holiday money? Haiz. That's bad enough you didn't buy it for me yet. This saturday's outing also cancelled aye. I have something on. Not just me but bam and murder also. Sorry-sorry people. We make it on countdown at woodlands je. I can't wait to meet all of you. Lol. Well,i want to watch dealova. Bye-

phew.

2008-12-24T04:42:00.000-08:00

Wahsey. I just got back home and finally got a chance to sit properly at a proper chair. -.- Just now,went out with bam they all to certain places. Heh! Penat gile seh keluar cari barang anniversary untuk bam dengan farhan. Kaki macam minta ampun. And my stomach is cramped at that time. Tapi,it's worth it la. There's a lot of laughter aye(?) We joke a lot today. We make sarcastic remarks to people we don't know,but we didn't mean anything at all. Ha ha. I had fun though. The only missing for today is that myra and jana wouldn't there with us. Hmm. Morning already went out to buy school uniform and school shoes. *Ta sabar tau na sekolah next week* I even overslept a little bit and didn't realise it's already ten in the morning. Janji pukul sepuluh. Hah. That's because. Ytd night,i didn't sleep until four in the morning. Blame that stupid chinese guy la,i met earlier. Haiz. After that,i meet them at the interchange since they insist to wait for me. Then. I was even shocked when i saw shamin there too(?) I thought the boys also have. But,it's only because teserempak dengan die sekejab. Bam told me he went ton-or-something. Nah,i don't even care ah. Blah-blah-blah. Took train and everything,stopped awhile for window shopping and off to another shop to look for things bam bekenan. And,atlast she sorted out her mind and bought something after three hours of rounding. -.-" Pfft. Trained back and here i am blogging. ): Btw,i missed the-guy-i-fall-for badly. If i meet him again for the third time by any chances,i swear i text him back. Mum has been shouting like nobody business. Before,i'm grounded i better sleep. Heh! Bye-

Charliesah.

2008-12-22T20:46:00.000-08:00

Hey,i was bloghopping until i stopped at charliesah's blog. Haiz. Babe,you not going anywhere without me right? Tell me,you are okay now(?) I don't want to lose someone like you in future or bile-bile. Maybe,we are not that close but i still treat you as someone special. I mean it. ): You make me smile sometimes in class and treat me as if we known each other long enough. When i fight with my bestfriends,you were there to keep me company. I appreciate that. Now,it's my turn to takecare of you. I am very much concern about your health right now. Hmm. *wipe my tears and sit right next to a window* I wished i could help anything. But. Remember to eat your medicine and take a good rest. Do not wander any other places if you're not feeling well. Text me soon,okay? I want you to keep me updated. I'm sorry for being the last person to know. Btw,today mum want to go threading at i-don't-know-where. Funny sia. With all my other makcik,pecaye ta? Then,i must tagged along since i'm buying something too before the things are all gone. Lol. Mum dapat gaji,anak tumpang gembira kan? Ha ha. Yameen,i'm not missing him alone la. (: I'm missing everyone. Mane mghilang? da lame ta text. Rindu soi. Heh! Before mak jerit like tarzan,i should just log off now. Bye-

Secondary five.

2008-12-21T21:12:00.000-08:00

Wahlau- Next year i'm in secondary five already. Cam tapecaye seh. Ha ha. Who would have guess heh? I'm the suitable candidate for o'levels(?) But,i'm still losing some of my favourite's people and i mean it. Those who had make my day in school and also after school. It's because of them tau i had made it to secondary five. If not,i'm so lazy to go school. I told each of them to text me everyday without fail. Hey,what must i say? I missed you guys badly right now. *Wipe my tears* I really do. If i had that one wished from santa,i want all of us to go secondary five together. Lols. I don't think he grant me that wishes. And santa didn't exist right? By the way,i just get back from school since it's the last day to hand in the form for the admission to secondary five. I went to school with atikah, bam and also farhan. They already make my day early in the morning. We planned to go macdonald's. I ate sausage mcmuffin without the egg,hashbrown and also coke(?) Wth! She(atikah) said it's good to drink coke than milo because i-don't-get-it-either. Ha ha. Reached school all that. Blah-blah-blah. -.- Then,farhan said he want us to go outing this saturday? I'm not confirm aye. I see who go first.

I missed murder. I missed bam. I missed jana. I missed myra. I missed yameen. I missed ayda. I missed farha. I missed aishah. I missed hidayah. I missed xinni. I missed ting. I missed nynie. I missed nat. I missed mb. I missed haziqa. I missed charliesah. I missed ahyeen. I missed mira. I missed apish. I missed an. I missed aikal. I missed dzul. I missed epah. I missed mamat. I missed myn. I missed pendek. I missed plek. I missed wak. And,last but not least i missed my school. ): I want them to be happy everyday,i do.

Hmm.

2008-12-16T22:05:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow is the n'level results,nervous. -______________________- I got no mood to blog now.

tired.

2008-12-14T06:06:00.000-08:00

I just came back from a pit,and my head still spinning around like a wheel. I didn't realise i fell asleep til nine-thirty until i heard dad and mum just come back home. Which i didn't know what time i fell asleep,maybe four plus? They went out without telling and didn't bring back food for me. Wow,that's good. Hmm. I didn't sleep the whole night yesterday. It was a family's pit. But hey,i also couldn't sleep inside the tent. Macam cacing kepanasan. Susah benar nak tidur tempat that has no bantal peluk. Now,i know why home is the best to stay in. I promise i won't dare to run away from home ever. Lols. Then,today we went to jalan kayu after packing all the tent stuffs. We went back at ten today because we have to return the bicycle we rent overnight. -_______- By the way,big sister suddenly accused me of giving a stupid bag to my friend. I cannot stand it already. Walau- I didn't even went out or use her bag seh. Ya,memang i used to take some of her things like ipod or slipper or something. But,she got no right to accuse me of taking her things now. I didn't even go out with my friends or better still meet them for a minute. And. Even if i were to go out,i didn't use the 'stussy' bag. I used crumpler and dickies only. I felt disappointed to have a sister that doesn't trust her own adik. Haiz. Nevermind ah! I appreciate it a lot. Do i look like a burglar to you? No right. I think i'm hungry seh. I want food.

It's the end.

2008-12-08T01:28:00.000-08:00

Just now,i woke up because dad keep nagging at me asking me to get up. I don'know whether it's nagging or not,but to me. It feels that i'm the maid. Like he cannot depend on my other sister like that. Pfft. Mum need to get to the hospital,and i'm supposed to take care of little brother,whocannotkeephismouthshut. And once i opened my eyes,i couldn't sleep again. Thanks okay ayah,for waking me up. After they left,i quickly do what i have to do. I do all the housechores alone and i'm feeling preety good with clean house.(: Well,10 days to n'level results. I feel like strangling myself to death real badly. I'm just scared that i would make mum and dad upset if i failed. Afterall,they always put their highs hope on me. And,i would be a bad daughter if i didn't get to their expectations. I really done badly in my PSLE,and i don't want to repeat the same mistakes. Hmm. I didn't hear any news about my bestfriends for awhile now. I guess they were busy with their stuffs. Haiz. Just now one of them happen to text me,but as usual i didn't notice until i took a glance at it. Aww,that's sweet of you to tell me that you missed all of us. I do too. I don't lied when i tell i missed us also. Hey,atleast i tried to be a bestfriend. But,yet you guys didn't have many time to go out. All of you are like workaholics. Working non-stop. Can i asked something? Are people made of battery? No right. -.- Guys,i want us to spent this one day together and not a single person working. For our last year at secondary school. But,not sure whether we in or out. Till then,text me.

I'm being pathetic.

2008-12-04T00:07:00.000-08:00

Definitely,what i am thinking now is nothing. Finally,i have to admit that i missed everyone i could think of even you-know-who. I am dead bored. Holidays were boring especially when all my bestfriends were working and one of them busy-talking-to-boyfriend-for-hours. I didn't meant a single words i said to bam yesterday. If you reading this,i'm sorry if i have hurt you. I was so stressed with what i am. My mind is just not right this recently,and if i kept mixing with anyone now. I would be so-called crazy in just a minute. I'm hoping to meet you guys. But,i need my time alone. Tomorrow,i will be following mum to my cousin's function. I hoped it will be going just great,i wished. Mum asked me to bath there as usual,lil mama you say what? I thought i heard wrongly but it's true. Forget it i never will. I have thought it over,i think i want to let go all my memories with that you-know-who. I couldn't hold on to it because he was just not mine. He's attached already and it has been days since i last heard from him. It was not alright when you-know-who didn't stick with me forever. When i first met you-know-who,he was just a simple guy i found along the way. He was kind and concern about me. He always make me feel better and nobody dares bullied me. I feel safe with him. But,i guess his heart is not with me and it belong to other girl. I couldn't find where his heart stand. Pfft. Well,i'm happy for you. Atleast,i really do. And to jana,girl be strong. We are always there if you need us. (: Takecare.

what?

2008-12-01T04:37:00.000-08:00

I got no mood today. ^_____________^

Anonymous-

2008-11-22T22:42:00.000-08:00

Every person i commented in friendster, there's always the extra ones. Pathetic right? I wished that person really had a life. Pfft. It's been two days i didn't online and friendster-ing. Lots of things going on in my mind. Felt like going somewhere and scream all my heart out. Thirteen december mum booked a pit for us all. Wah! That's awesome though. Finally, having a proper family gathering after a year. Currently now chatting with beloved cousin. Well, Sister's birthday coming up soon. First sister, saedah binte abdul latiff. [: I thought of buying her something so that she won't feel herself left out. But, i don't know what should i bought for her. She's a bit picky at time seh. Hmm. Should i buy her something green? Yesterday i went out with my adik i think, i noticed a guy walking so senget. But luckily he's handsome and also cute. Wth! I don't know if he walk that way or he's trying to show off to his friends who walk like that. I got no idea. But, if i were to comment about his walking. I would said he's just one pathetic retarded loser i have met in my life. [: Tomorrow early in the morning have to follow mum go eat breakfast and maybe i think i need some shopping to do. Badly. Pfft.

I think.

2008-11-16T23:23:00.000-08:00

I think i better stay jobless for now. I'm in no mood to work. Especially when there's a lot of things going on in my mind. I know, bestfriend also know. Well, like finally just now i meet up with my girlfriends to take my kamus and earpiece back so that mum won't nag at me anymore. But, whatever it is it's my things okay? [: Bile dah jumpa, macam jakun pula pasal dah lame tak nampak dorang. Lols. Then, it's raining heavily like the weather eventually know how much emotions i felt now. Losing every person i cared. Sadly. Only arghteecar didn't turned up. Maybe, because this is just a last minute plan. Sorry! Text myra, and was so shocked when she said emmy shoved her. What kind of a guy seh tu mat? Very kasar. Should make a report okay myra? Then halfway handphone jammed. Mum, i want to buy new handphone. Like right now!(: Demanding eyy? Dah luh have to get ready by now. I want to go outttttt-

Choices.

2008-11-13T22:43:00.000-08:00

I'm not supposed to fall in love with someone i rarely know. I'm supposed to treat him as a friend, my own bestfriend. I promise him that before we even start our friendship and when i think back i'm stupid. Well, what can i said i'm shocked when he told me he fall in love with someone older than him. Like four years older. Kanget pe? ]: He's attached already and i'm the first to know. Is my actions wrong by trying to avoid him when he wanted me to be always by his side? I'm happy for him but at the same time i think i lose someone i care, someone close. I'm just scared he would be paying more attention to his girlfriend and not me when we spent time together. I always feel even before he's attached that i would lose someone that never failed to make me smile everyday. It shows that i'm not the chosen girl. Pfft. Would you let me go if i asked you to? I cannot bear to see you with other girl and that's because that girl was not me. Would you love me if i told you i love you all this while? You won't and i know what your answer is. I just realised that i'm just wasting my time waiting for someone who's already happily attached. I think i'm not going to hold back anymore. I'm too upset. -.- Why me? I've heard this song by rossa, kini. I think it's suit me and him. Well, i think i end this here.

WAHH-

2008-11-13T06:14:00.000-08:00

I guess i'm tired. ]: Woke up early in the wee hours. So that i could take my medicine,and like finally i can telan pill now. Well, i have been sick for three weeks now. Keep vomiting after having my meal, and i think my stomach is empty after all those vomits. And mum even told me. I lost my grey jazz, black shoes and also nike slipper. Blame myself for putting outside. Pfft. Stupid people go and steal. Fucking iritate by this kind of people. They might jolly well go and die! Lempang kang? Why ah of all stealing? Parents cannot afford to buy shoes and slipper is it? I will kill them for sure seh. Little sister's birthday going to come soon. I haven't thought of buying anything because i got no money left for her presents. I need to buy a new slipper and new clothes for my work soon. And, i have to beg my second sister to go interview with me. [: Eh hello, please follow me. Thank you. I am hungry seh. But, i scared after eating, i will vomit all of them back. Tired okay.

Random picture. [:

I want to have a boyfriend who knows how to handle skateboard.

Uhm.

2008-11-11T20:19:00.000-08:00

The picture.

I got nothing to do but upload that day favourite shot. [: Mum been nagging at me and asked me to shut down the computer. And yes, if i do. What difference does it make? I still slack around right. Like hello, exam over and results around the corner. Yet she asked me to do things for her. Just now i woke up, then flashback of all my bestfriends and school in my mind. I miss-ed them but what to do. They are very busy. Xinni, even text me to tell the rest about next week outing. I will look forward to that day. Lols. So much things happened in a day. Like yesterday for example. I don't know that things would not go the way i wanted it to be. That bitch really doesn't deserve my apology. Maybe, being friends with her back was a mistake. I realised it now that you are just a typical retarded loser.[: Well, i have to get ready maybe going out soon. Goodbye.

Sick, plus tired of nagging.

2008-11-09T18:52:00.000-08:00

I'm feeling sick at the moment. Mum brought me to polyclinics early in the morning at 7. Pfft. Still mad with her for nagging at me the whole morning. ]: Dad even worse,asked me to go get antibiotics when i haven't even finished mine. Then just now at the polyclinics. I was waiting for the queue number when this nyonya like otak so mereng wanted to go in first. Very kanchong semacam! She even got scolded from the doctor. Buduh right tuh nyonya? [: After that,went home bought mee rebus for dad plus baby brother. Pity them for staying at home without mum. Confirm tunggang terbalik rumah? Lols. Currently chatting with Myraquella. She's having problem with her darling emmy. Felt like killing emmy right now. Why can't you just make her happy? For once and that's all i'm asking you. It's not that hard to do. Play with her hearts,i definitely killed you. I tell you for sure seh. By the way,i didn't contact all my girlfriends for like days now. Yameen,sorry didn't reply your text. Hp bill melambung and kena confiscate. When i have time,i text you again. I think i'm bored. Damn bored. ]:

my girlfriends. (:

2008-11-08T23:03:00.000-08:00

Murder;
Well,i've been friends with her for three years now. So much we had gone through in our friendship,like people talk bad behind our back and spread stupid rumours that we didn't even create in the first place either,what the hell okay people. I always fight with her but only for a moment because i know,without her i don't know what is friendship and maybe even better i don't know what is going to become of me. Even though her relationship was in the rock,she never fail to smile. She accept everything but her patience are limited. She's strong. She always said. 'Never fail to try the best,if you think it's worth it'. Thanks okay dear girlfriend,i love you. (:

Myraquella;
What can i said about this girl? She's my everything. She help me a lot. And i apreciate every little things she does. I love this stubborn girl no matter how worst people think she is. Yeah,we always fight about some misunderstanding but i know what she said to me whenever we fight i didn't take it to heart. What harsh words i said to her,i really didn't mean anything. I can say she's strong in terms of relationship and also standing up for her friendship no matter what it takes. And i really hope her relationship this time,is what she yearn for all this while. And yes,she's peramah and beautiful. (:

Bam;
My kembar,my favourite girlfriend. Yeah,we do fight but i know she always mengalah. She's beautiful and she loves dancing a lot. She really badly want to go to secondary five but yet,she don't want to lose all her bestfriend at the same time. Lols. Mira,we will always be here when you needed us. Okay? Well,she's single and unavailable. She thinks commiting to some relationship is not an easy task. Right? She helped me to move on and give me advice to be strong. I love her. I'm happy to know her in the first place. She's loud. She make jokes to keep us alive. And i'm happy to have her in my everyday life. I want to be the best for her so that i will not lose someone like her in future. (:

Jana;
Ah,yes my one and only laughing partner. I love her even though i just know her this year. (: She is the best to me. She is strong to accept anything that come upon her life. Maybe,she didn't succeed in her love life but trust me,having her as a girlfriend is what guys always wanted. And yes people,she's beautiful. She have a beautiful heart that no one has. She trust her bestfriends and also she's afraid of losing everyone of them. Including those who had made her happy. I miss her truckloads. I just want her to be happy. It means a lot to me to see her laugh. (:

Yameen;
Oh,like finally i'm talking about this beautiful little girl. (: Eh girl,i miss you a lot okay? Eventhough we are not that close. I really don't want to lose her like how i lose the others. She's a great person to talk to and yes,she's interesting to be with. She's taken okay people. jangan bermimpi nak dapatkan die. Lols. She make me laugh when we text eachther and when we used to go out i love to see her smile. And btw, you are a good friend. You treat all of them equally. It's just that they are confused about what's going on. Don't blame yourself if anything went wrong. (:
And last but not least,last long eh with fawed. Takecare,i will text you soon. ILY.

I really do.

2008-11-04T02:44:00.000-08:00

Okay, today murder's one year anniversary with adek. Suprising seh, pejam celik pejam celik dah pun one year. Who would have guess right? (: I'm happy for her. She had gone through many obstacles trying to hold her relationship that long. Well, mine wasn't working that well. Maybe, knowing him was a mistake. How i wished i didn't know him in the first place so that maybe i won't end up getting hurt. Yeah, i'm referring to the pendek boy. It has been days, maybe weeks since i last saw the rest. I miss-ed my bestfriends badly. Real bad. ): Pfft. Where are you guys this days? The only person i contacted was only the girls. By the way, maybe trying the starbucks interview with lyna. Since she also agreed to try. Girlfriend, aku faham. Not more than that. Okay? (:

I do miss-ed him, who don't?

2008-10-31T03:16:00.000-07:00

Day by day pass by without i realising it. Time do flies, and it seems just yesterday i first know him. I guess he's taken aback by what had happened that day. He haven't text me till today. He didn't picked up calls or replying one of my messages. Well, strongly i admit that i miss-ed him. I keep having him in my minds for days now. I don't know why. Well couple do fight, who don't right? Yeah, of course not everyday but certain times. I don't know why we fought in the first place. Ah yes! Now i remember. We fought because of a stupid conversation. So pathetic of him to started it first. ): Pfft.

Dear.
I only want the best in you okay? If i keep giving in, when is your turn going to be? My patience are limited. Is it wrong for me be angry when i'm suppose to? Or was i a nobody to you? I needed this answer more than you do. I sacrifice my time to entertain your craps. What's all this? It's a waste fighting with you. I know it ain't worth it. I got a life young man. I know every do's and dont's. I guess if you going to be like this forever, i think we should just go our separate ways. And jyeah, i will remember our fun time together. It's locked in my heart. Our plan to go movies together, just keep it as a mistake. And i don't regret knowing someone like you because i believe people changed sometimes. Just takecare of yourself. Carry on with what you think is best, i don't want to be 'batu penghalang' to you. Pfft. ):

A.W.A.Y

My horoscopes tells it.

2008-10-28T22:30:00.000-07:00

My horoscopes.
Just because you said goodbye to someone doesn't mean that they still can't inspire or affect your future in a positive way. You take them with you wherever you go, and they will always be a part of you. So try to switch from sadness to gratitude that you ever got to know them in the first place! Your feelings are important to honor, but you cannot let them control your goals in life. Use your head today and start moving again, in a new direction.

Yeah i already move on now. I want to start a new book with my pendek boy. (: He's the one. I know it. But, i just want to be friends first. Because once bitten twice shy. Right? I'm not into relationship now because i don't want to end up getting hurt myself. I want to be frank with him, no more secrets. It's been weeks i last blogged. Busy with stuffs, finding work. Life kind of boring now. N'level ended and i started to miss-ed school. I don't know why. I missed my classmates and also all my bestfriends. They're busy with work so no time to lepak now. Pfft. Soon i'll be starting mine. Well, got to go now. Nak keluar.

TO MYRAQUELLA;
Hey girl, last long okay? (: With md.Rozaimie, the satay boy! Bile ni nak belanja aku makan satay dekat lau pa sat? Aku tunggu seh. Lols.

Thanks.

2008-10-05T21:55:00.000-07:00

Do you know what? You are a one freaking pathetic iritating fucking retarded person i have found in my life- You're a liar, you made promises that is meant to be broken. What has got into you? Yeah right! And to tell you the truth i don't like what you are now. You don't deserve us all. You are a bunch of jokes. You hurt your own bestfriend? What makes you think we are to blame? Cakap orang belit-belit cerita. Kau tuw ape kurngnye? Cakap memang tak bertitik uhs. You can live without us? Whose the one who wanted friendship at first? Who decide what we are? YOU! Yes you. To think that we treat you more as a bestfriend. Is this what you repay us? Thanks a lot heh- Thanks for being the sweetest fucking EX- bestfriend. (: But, nevermind we can live without you also. You are nothing compared to us. Tell all those secrets we said. Tell all. Because we just don't care okay?

Untuk sesiape yang terasa luh heh;
Thanks banyak-banyak.
sayang soi dengan orang macam kau.
(:

life need to move on right;

2008-09-30T22:23:00.000-07:00

Okay, i admit life need to move on. I know it's hard to believe what i said but people, i'm strong now and each of your advice help me a lot. I don't need him anymore to make my day again. I don't need to rely on him to make me happy. I have found a new someone in my life and i should treasure that person right now. I have you guys to be there for me. It seems people you loved come and go without you realising it right? Even the closest one that is next to your heart. I already know that this day would come to end all the hurtful things i have been through. Thanks for making that happened dear boy. I am tired to cry and i don't think i have any tears anymore. It's true i couldn't accept the fact but my bestfriends stood up for me and give me advice to move on. And i did. I really apreciate it. Now, all i have to do is to make up to the things i wasted through this entire year before it's too late. Since it's the first day of hari raya, i want to seek forgveness to those whom i have hurt or talk bad over the past few years. I didn't meant anything because everybody make mistakes. And i admit i wasn't that perfect. I am sorry okay? I promise i won't repeat my mistakes anymore.

TO NEW PERSON;
I will try to treasure you the way you treasure me. I won't abandon you anymore. Thanks for giving me the chance. If we fought a couple of times, i know i didn't meant to find fault with you. Jealous tandenye sayang? Betul tak? Thanks for cheering me up and hold on to me when i am down. :D

Graduation(:

2008-09-26T07:11:00.000-07:00

Okay. I just found out something that really makes me think twice about going forward. I just don't know why i am taken aback by those words. It's too hard to forget what i have heard. Yeah, i know. No more negative thoughts, think positive. Oh well- after all that i have heard? Think it's easy to forget? ]; Haish. Just now we had our last graduation gathering. It is more sad when ms matthew played this one song titled 'one wish'. We didn't cried at first but after the song is being played, everyone cried. Even it's hard to believe when the boys cried too. Hafiz, farhan and shamin. Please stop crying- it's not like we are not going to see each other anymore. Haha! Kuatkan semangat. Jana, murder, bam and myra jugek mesti kuatkan semangat. She's the best teacher we had so far! And. To think that this is our last year. We must be at our very best tawu.

Noor Atikah. Nurul Jana. Noor Amirah. Nur Amirah. Muhammad Hafiz. Muhammad Shamin. Muhammad Farhan. Y;
Tkk muh nnges lagy okee-
Kalau kite strong and believe in our friendship,
We will be together.
(:

their heart's.

2008-09-19T03:52:00.000-07:00

Hello people. Just came back. Sumpah ako macm orngg gile. Baju tkk tuck in betul, beg sengett. Nasib orgg tkk tinguk. Tating jugek uhs minah-minah smr tinguk. By the way, Jana, sorry syang pasal that duet' thing. Takd niatt papee seh. Die ygg ajak suro challenged dengan murder and jack. Sumpah bukan nkk uatt jealous ke ape. Okee? Cabaran ako, kow belum lagy uatt tawu. It's still on bebeh. LOL. (: Talked to mamat- mamat, daa sudah laa tuw move on je laa. Tak muh seksa diri kow gneh. Mmang ako mengaku she's special to you. Susah nkk lupekan kenangan kow dengan die tapi, it's seems she asked you to move on without her. Ako will helped kow lupekan die heh. Kow pun nkk kenek tolong ako jugek lupekan seseorang tuw. We are on this together. That's what bestfriend should do. Papee kite nanges sekuat-kuat hati. (: Haha. Today lesson boring soi. All the way dekat class macm budak buduh. Apish ceritakan pasal kenangan die dengan chacha. Betul ckapp kow apish, walaupun kite kasi kow pengganti pun, hati kow ttap dekat die. Sabar je. Hidup ini harus kite tempuh dengan rela hati. Kalau kow need a shoulder to cry on kite adee dengan kow, terutama sekali jana dengan an. Okee?

Muhammad Bin Abdul Rahman/ Muhammad Hafiz Bin Jafreeli;
Korang kuatkan hati heh-
(:

Help me.

2008-09-16T07:06:00.000-07:00

FOR HIM:
Okay fine, i admit it myself. I cannot forget you eventhough i have tried a million times. But what's the use of keeping my feelings for you when all you ever did was throw it right back at my face? What's the meaning of all this? Did i ever hurt you in any way that you need to punished me this way? You stopped talking and even neglected me all this while. Stop all this shit- I had enough. I am sorry dear boy. Please don't treat me this way. I beg you. Don't hurt me anymore. If you are reading this; I don't care if you cannot accept me but atleast treat me as one of our bestfriend.

FOR FRIENDS:
Help me forget him even if all i ever did was to cry for him. Atleast, i won't have to see him in every of my dreams. My fairytale is over. It has been closed. My heartache was not that important. I have to be strong. Just to see him happy with the girl of his dreams. Now, let me stand and fight for this. I want your support. To forget this one boy whom i used to like-

Please dear god;
Let me be strong for just this one boy.
):

for both of you.

2008-08-30T00:54:00.000-07:00

I miss-ed us. I miss-ed the way we spent our time, when we karoake and joke about each other admirer. I admit i want us back. But, i just could not do that because it seems that we have to move on. You even have a replacement in just a week. You be-friended someone you hate and you left us wondering whether we were the cruel one. I am shock when you said that we were the one to blamed when you failed your english prelim paper. What have got into you? We didn't do anything even the others. Why you put us in such a big blame? You said we had a replacement? But, did you even bother asking why? No, you both didn't. How i wish-ed we never have to go through this and be like before. But, it is only my wishes and nothing else. It's time we move on- and forget all about us. Find a friend that can hold you up when you are in a verge of a breakdown, friend that can joke with both of you about your admirer and find a friend that can re-place the four of us. Good luck in everything you do. Pass your n level with flying colours. Because, this may be our last wishes-

I really miss-ed the six of us;
Takecare, my ex best-friends.
(:

Revenge has just begun.

2008-08-17T05:02:00.000-07:00

Baby brother just got back home! I miss him a-lot uhs. Currently messaging with yameen(: Talk-ed about her sickness and also someone. Sayang, don't be sad oke? tk muh bnyk pkerkn dorang tawuk. You have to follow your heart. Jyeah. I am so damn bored. Felt like wanted to get out of the house but i fell asleep myself. I think i am tired after a day at the hospital yesterday. I couldn't get through my bestfriend except for sabby(:. She talk-ed about that babi buto tuh. Memang padan muke lau satu hary kau knek rembat. Haha! Bdan bsar tpi check-check penakut nak mampos.

To babi buto;
Eh. Best eh kau! Dah buat cerita pasal orang, tawuk pun nk minta tolong nan orang yang kau buat cerita jugek. Dasar manusia bertopeng setan uhs. Tuh body odour pergi hilang kan dulu eh baru nak brbual pasal kite-kite. Kau bkan handsome eh nak kutuk-kutuk orang. Lau aku neh jantan, dah lamer aku beken kau. Kau lei pergi jahanam! Jantan tak sdar diri. Orang dah tolong, neh pek kau balas? So much of a friend. Kite tak buat pape nn kau, neh pek kau kasi kite balik? Takecare laa eh.

It's time for that revenge;
For that fucking retard loser and babi buto tuh.
(: Tinguk laa mcam nerh.

Hearts talking.

2008-08-16T11:30:00.000-07:00

It's 230 in the morning. Still, haven't slept. I don't know why. Chat with mamat:D. I guess he still thinking about yameen. Felt sad when he pour his heart out to said about yameen. It's obvious that he really do love her and he just don't want to lose her again. He told me he was too late to get her love back. If he had that very chance i think he will grab it without any hesitation. He told me he regret for treating her very bad and he told me it's impossible between them because he know that her love will be two-sided. I cried when i chat-ted with him. First time, i see him like that. Talking those sweet sentence that is only meant for yameen. Yameen, if you ever read this blog. I hope you are strong to face it. I just hoping you would give him a second chance. After all, everybody makes mistake. Thinking back, i realised that i have to do something to get that memories back. Thanks mamat for making me realise my stupid mistake. I just hoped you would fight for your love no matter what. I know it hurts to see the fact.

Be strong boy-friend;
Get her back no matter how hurts it could be.
Love(:

Hospital(:

2008-08-16T08:59:00.000-07:00

Today went hospital visit my baby brother. He was cute with his pyjamas. I miss him a-lot. Adik, takecare oke. Don't be naughty at the hospital. All day sit beside him but at the same time go vending machine, bought sandwich. Yoghurt vending machine dah stuck uh. Ter-lepas peluang nak beli yoghurt. Before, i went inside. A group of students kacau me. But, sorry to said that i think they are lower secondary and i don't mixed with anyone under age. Haha! I played swing then two girls were like mumbling to me. Their conversations.

First girl: Can we play the swing?
[I kept quiet thinking that they would go away but they didn't. I just looked at them.]

Second girl: Aku teka die bisu atau pekak uh. Die tak jawab.
First girl: Jangan-jangan die cine tak? Ayuh, kite berbual cine? Ni hao ma?
[I get up, and said.]

Me: Saya bukan bisu dan pekak, atau cine. Pergi uh main swing tuh.
[Then, they looked down.]

But, actually quite funny. They looked so cute. Haha! Then, i went home reached around 1045. It was a restless night afer a day at the hospital. Currently chatting with; Zhen qi(: and lyna. Syikin, my adik tidur like a pig. Snoring from just now.
Oke, i think i want to sleep.

:D takecare.

survey from YAMEEN(:

2008-08-14T13:39:00.000-07:00

Name 20 people.at the end of the survey, choose 5 people to do the survey. Don't read the questions, name the 20 people first!

1. AMIRAH
2. ATIKAH
3. SHIERA
4. AMIRAH ALI
5. SAB
6. YAMEEN
7. AISHAH
8. SUET TENG
9. NADIA
10. HALIM
11. ABDUL HAFIZ
12. NYAN
13. DZULFIKRI
14. KHAIRUL
15. MAMAT
16. APISH
17. SHARIZAL
18. RABBANI
19. SHAMIN
20. HUSAIFAH

*how did you meet number 14?- secondary school

*what would you do if you have not met number 17?- maybe, i would not understand what friendship is.

*what if number 9 and 20 dated each other?- LOL.i don't think so because one of them are attach-ed!

*will 5 and 10 date each other?- NO WAY! they fight oke.

*describe number 1?- My bestest best friend I've ever had in the whole wide world :D

*do you think number 8 is attractive?- OF COURSE!

*describe number 7.- She is preety. She help-ed me with my malay. She make me laugh at the same time with her clumsy-ness.

*do you know any family members of number 12?- I only know his mum and dad's name. :)

*what language(s) does number 15 speaks?- Malay & English.

*who is number 9 hanging out with?- I dont know? Maybe her sisters or her friends?

*how old is number 16 this year?- 16 same as me!

*when was the last time you spoke with number 13?- I guess yesterday at the 903 bus.

*who is number 2 favourite singer or band?- Tak tau. Heh!

*have you ever dated number 4?- Of course uh! Hary-hary kite date. Btul takk?

*would you ever date number 19?- Yes! if he is fine with it. HA HA HA~

*is number 3 single ?- YES~ she is waiting for that someone. :)

*what is number 10 last name?- rashid! :D

*would you ever be in relationship with number 11?- OF COURSE! i think he is the sweetest guy i can find. HAHA(:

*what is the school of number 13?- SLSS.

*where does number 6 stay?- I don't know, i didn't have the time to asked.

*what is your favourite thing about number 5?- I love everything about her because she is a good listener when i had problems. okay?

*have you ever seen number 14 naked?- i think they got video. but it's half naked. :]

NOW CHOOSE 5 PEOPLE TO DO THIS SURVEY!
-Myra
-Nadia
-Halim
-Eqah
-Mira

3 in the morning.

2008-08-14T12:04:00.000-07:00

Oh. It's three in the morning. I just can't sleep. I have been mingling with my bed nearly five hours now. And guess what? My contact lens was tear-ed. It really did tear until it was half. I think because i open-ed anyhow. I am tired. I miss my baby brother. I hoped he is doing fine at the hospital. After all, mum told me he can't stop vomiting. Felt like going hospital today. No need come school. But, prelim is around the corner. Mum ask-ed me to go school, study then you can visit. By then, janggut pun dah naik bulu dah. Thinking about yesterday, i really had fun with my girlfriends even though sabby didn't follow us. It's quite sad uh. But then yeah, we had fun watching movies at penguin house. Eh penguin![; BEST~ pasal ade banyak binatang kau. LOL. And thanks for the service at your house. Sekarang ne saket piyot i think pasal makan maggi uh.

Oke la i think i need to go toilet now;
Takecare la. [;

BOY[;

2008-08-14T03:34:00.000-07:00

Boy, i just don't know why i am acting weird infront of you. I just don't know what i was thinking back then. It's true i admit i still hate to see your face. But, everyday i won't failed to remember you. Even though i know that it is impossible between us. I tried. I really tried to forget you. Because that is what you had always wanted it to be and if thats make you happy, then i am fine with it. Boy, i wish-ed we would be like before where we are better off friends. Tell me what should i do to forget what we have been through. It seems just yesterday you said that we were always be friends. But. It shows that you break your promise. You ignored me. You pretended that i wasn't there. And guess what, congratulations! You broke my fucking heart to your satisfaction. I am like a fucking retard loser to everyone for believing in you. I am sorry to tell you the thruth.

And takecare boy;
It seems that i don't need you anymore.
[; Carry on with your life.

GIRLFRIENDS(:

2008-06-20T06:25:00.001-07:00

BEST-BEST friend;
thanks for being there for me.
(: i really appreciate your attention-ness.
it's been months.
and we manage to overcome all hurdles.
aku sayang korangg~

and to yameen bby(:
emah punn sayang meen juga.
nnty klw dh dpt keje, bilang emah eh.
(: takecare~

(: cousin's

2008-06-20T06:13:00.000-07:00

hello[:
zhen, thanks pasal tolong aku dengan blogskins.
(: SAYANG kau. LOL~
btw, hari neh NPCC training's macam biasa.
aku nak jadi itu emcees seyy.
abe guess what?
kite kena audition juga la.
and it's hafiz, me and nisa ajer. ((:
all the NPCC's cadets did the excellent jobb!
AKU RESPECT KORANGG.
only after NPCC;
my twin cousin datang overnight.
aku rinduuu habes dengan cousin aku neh.
then, we went out.
to causeway, civic and chckpoint(:
blame the mum's la.
tapi sumpah kite penat giler.
sekarang punnn makcik-makcik masih aderh pt rumah.
kecoh habes!
BESOK kenduri oi; takmuw lupe.

hmm((:

new friend(:

2008-06-18T06:04:00.000-07:00

oh hello[;
currently, chat-ting with myra, bam, zhen-zhen, shiera.
kecoh~!
lagi-lagi ini zhen zhen.
zhen, gerek la chat dengan kau.
LOL! [;
and thanks for the belated birthday wish.

to MYRA;
kenapa nak sedih?
hidup ini mesti go on.
OKAY sayang?
and bby, thanks for the nasi ayam and coke.
aku macam terhutang budi la.

hmmm.
[; tadi went back home, meet mum.
die nak cari night light.
entah la.
tenguk-tenguk habuk pun takde.
lalalalalalala.
BALIK; beli yong tau fooo.

the breaking news.

2008-06-17T06:18:00.000-07:00

hello[:
just want-ed to recap for the past days.
for not blogging.

14 june;
there's nothing to said about this date.
but~ i'm so disappointed.
we supposed to be going out to SENTOSA.
and we didn't.
fucking annoyed with everyone.
wth. pfffffffffft.
then dad was like nagging non-stop.
finally,
stay-ed at home, watched television.
];

15 june;
okay?
let's break the news my dear hot-hot-heats friends.
it's my 16th birthday~ !
weetweet*
finally, afterall the waiting.
HAHA!
first person was SAB.
THEN; murder, myra, shiera, bam.
and the rest my friends.

PS. thanks guys~ ingat juga korang dekat aku!

16 june;
went to school as per normal for parade.
BLAH-BLAH-BLAH.

17 june;today!
don't want to said anything.
but~ i had a wonderful time with my girlfriends.
HEE~
it's the best day.
muker hitam habis!

hmmm(:

friday the 13th.

2008-06-13T01:26:00.000-07:00

oh hello. (:
PEOPLE ku yang hotstuffs.
just now went to school alone pasal overslept rabak giler.
hari neh kn maths remedial.
hujan lebat~
then, i thought to myself;
today was the FRIDAY the 13th righht?
and guess,
betul-betul punye bad luck.
luckily, i didn't slip and fell when i was walking.
then sampai sekolah, nampak my girlfriends; murder, bam and sabby.
dengan boy-friends; jack and pendek.
after a day studying with no food and drink.
ms loo finally treat kite orang semua nasi ayam penyet.
SEDAPP~ birthday treat pahh?
after eating, lepak bawah block sekejab dengan lain.
berbual pasal besok~ outing laar.
then kite semua,
BALIK.

to MYRA;
don't cry.
if he really meant what he said,
then let him go.
maybe you and him wasn't right to be in love.
you two just like each other.
and 'like' and 'love' are two different words.
i know;
i have no rights to said anything.
because i'm not in your place and neither were i in a relationship.
but i felt what you felt.

to DZUL;
you and myra can still be friends.
like dulu OKAY?
jangan pasal korang punye so-called 'ttm' thingy,
KORANG bermusuh.
afterall this may be our last year okay.

hmm. ((:

happy birthday mum. (:

2008-06-12T05:28:00.000-07:00

oh hello. [=
people, sorry for not updating blog lately.
been busy with stuffs.
you know, i know, public don't know alrighht.
btw, today happens to be mum's birthday.
TAPI nampak-nampak nyer, sayalah orang yang terakhir knknkn.
wahh~ die dah 46 seyy.
makin tua laar mak aku neh *weetweet.

happy birthday mum; thanks for bringing me up!

hmmm.
chat-ted with mb.
dah lame tak berbual dengan die.
tapi sumpah girlfriends; nothing BIG~
takmau marah ye?
hari neh pergi geylang serai pusing-pusing banyak kali.
kaki pun naik lenguh[tak tahu spell].
then ternampak pakcik AFRO laar.
HA-HA.
itu ajelah, will will will update real soon.

girlfriends&boyfriends.
cannot wait for saturday's outing.